New York has more farms per square mile than Nebraska. Stick that in your pipe and smoke it, Syracuse hoops.
Sunday night, after knocking Michigan State out of the NCAA Men's Division I Basketball Tournament, Syracuse players were heard in the locker room throwing shade on Nebraska. This Friday, they're headed to Omaha to play No. 2 seed Duke at the CenturyLink Center.
Overheard in the Syracuse locker room: “Nebraska is like Missouri. Flat and farms.”— Nicole Auerbach (@NicoleAuerbach) March 18, 2018
Syracuse is off to Omaha next weekend.
"Nebraska is like Missouri," someone said. "Flat and farms."
Ah, the naivete of college.
Nebraska is the 19th flattest state in the U.S. Missouri is the 31st. And yeah, OK, New York is the 39th flattest, but that's not exactly a chasm.
It would have been more accurate to say Nebraska is "moderately flat, like Iowa or Ohio or Arkansas." In fact, the very locker room where that insult was cast was in Detroit. Michigan is the 12th flattest state, seven spots flatter than Nebraska.
As for farms, Missouri has nearly 100,000 farms, the second most in the U.S. That's more than twice as many as Nebraska. In fact, New York has only 11,900 fewer farms than Nebraska.
But here's the real hammer.
New York, smaller than Nebraska by land area, actually has MORE farms per square mile than Nebraska does. Nobody squashes a beef like Nebraska.
OK, so maybe many of New York's farms are tiny little dairy operations, and Nebraska boasts many gigantic farms that take up 90 percent of the state's land mass. But let's not act like Syracuse is some thriving metropolis.
When the Syracuse Orange come to Omaha, they'll arrive in a city three times the size of their own where people make nearly twice as much money a year on average.
And the zoo. Don't even get us started on the zoo.
So yeah, Nebraska's a little flat. It has its fair share of farms. But man, look who's calling the kettle black. Or the orange orange.
Just take note of this, small-timers. When you park your bus for the big game in the big city on Friday night, this isn't little Syracuse (population 143,378).
Here in a real city, the parking meters run till 9.