Dear Annie: In the past four years, my wife has become friendly with a male co-worker. The two of them phone each other often and send an enormous number of text messages, often more than 100 a week. These calls and text messages are not work related. At her mother’s house, she disappears into the bathroom for a long stretch, and when I check our cellphone account, I see that she was on the phone with him during that time. I also have overheard parts of their conversations in which she complains that he hasn’t made enough personal time for her.
This guy picks her up on holiday mornings and takes her out for breakfast. In fact, any day they have off of work, he comes to our house while I’m at my job. During this same period, my wife changed her hairstyle, purchased blouses that show more cleavage and started wearing thong panties. She insists that she and this co-worker are just friends, but with all of these things going on, I find it hard to believe there isn’t more to it. Our children are grown and married. We have discussed getting a divorce on multiple occasions. My wife wants to keep the house, but can’t afford to pay me for my half of it. I have tried to move forward with a separation, but she fights me every step of the way. I don’t know what to do anymore. Any suggestions?