I had hoped to interview the real Bo Pelini about the fake Bo Pelini, but the Nebraska football coach rightfully let his brilliant tweet stand.
Instead, I settled for fake Bo. And here's what Faux Pelini had to say:
EG: What was the best thing about this past season?
FP: My favorite was that day I didn't get fired from my job.
EG: Does your wife feel like a widow in football season?
EG: Do you shout at home?
FP: Only when I'm awake.
EG: What's the name of your cat?
FP: I TOLD YOU I'M NOT TALKING ABOUT MY CHILDREN.
EG: What do you and Bo have in common?
FP: We both have Twitter accounts with “Pelini” in the name and we both miss Ndamukong Suh a lot.
EG: Has “Not Shawn Eichorst” (@NotADEichorst, the parody account of Nebraska's athletic director) ever threatened your job?
FP: I make more money than him so I think we know who's in charge.
EG: Now that you and @BoPelini have said hello, what's next in your future?
FP: @BarackFauxbama I guess.
EG: What would surprise people to know about you, Faux?
FP: I'm actually Tom Osborne.