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Brad's afternoon edition
Click here to read the morning edition.
* So far this week, embarrassing tapes of Mitt Romney and President Obama have been released. I've seen so many embarrassing videos that I feel like I'm watching "American Idol" auditions.
* I miss the old days when the only secret videotapes in the fall were recorded by Bill Belichick.
* President Obama has recently visited Iowa, Ohio and Illinois. Either he's targeting key swing states or discussing a bailout for Big Ten football.
* A British adventurer is attempting a 1,000-mile swim in the Missouri River. To prepare to spend that long in the Missouri River, he spent the past year dodging junk cars.
* A man named Gary Johnson could be a factor in the presidential race, as he leads a third organized political party. A third organized political party? What are the other two?
* Ohio Sen. Rob Portman has agreed to portray President Obama in Romney debate preparation. To discuss it, Portman invited some colleagues to lunch. He was so into character as Obama that he charged them $20,000 per plate.
* Mitt Romney has recorded a Spanish language ad. This, after both the Romney and Obama campaigns ran out of harsh things to say about the other in English.
* The Deb Fischer-Bob Kerrey debate Sept. 28 will air on MeTV. Isn't the approval rating of Congress low enough already without pre-empting MASH reruns?
* In the new Lee Terry campaign commercial, he stands in front of a tote board showing how many terms he's served in Congress. Wait, my mistake. That's actually a national debt clock.
* J.C. Penney is offering free haircuts for kids on Sunday. As if it isn't traumatic enough for kids going back to school in J.C. Penney clothes, now they can also have the free Penney's haircut.
* Beyonce told Anderson Cooper she loves changing diapers and that it's a “beautiful” experience. This is when you know someone has been a parent for about 8 minutes.
* In Chicago, a library book was returned 78 years after it was checked out. As soon as the returnee pays the fine, our economic problems are over.
* There's a new proposal to torture political prisoners by making them sit between Nicki Minaj and Mariah Carey on “American Idol.”
* Kansas City offensive lineman Zach Hannon chose Nebraska over Missouri. Some believe he picked NU over Missouri because his goal has always been to play college football in front of people who are sober.
* According to a report, high school football players in Maryland solicited prostitutes. The trouble started when the coach told the kids to “go out and act like NFL players.”