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Brad's morning edition
* The big story: The entire world is about to be united in sport when an opening ceremony featuring 20,000 dancing children is broadcast to a worldwide audience of billions. But enough about Big Ten Media Days.
* It continues to be scorching hot in Omaha. I thought I was watching the beginning of an episode of "Bonanza" with the burning map. Turned out to be a local TV station giving the weathercast.
* There are four finalists to be the new police chief of Omaha. Mayor Jim Suttle plans to introduce the winner by shouting, "Who wants to be a millionaire?"
* Mayor Suttle wants to raise the pay of his chief of staff $25,000. The chief of staff would earn $150,000 while his boss, Suttle, makes $110,369. The underling would make more than the boss. Compared to a lot of things that happen in city government here, this makes sense.
* The employee would earn more than the boss. After hearing this, Warren Buffett's secretary said, "Say ..." and Buffet said, "Don't even think it."
* On Wednesday, Mitt Romney left on a trip that will take him from London to Israel to Poland. It's not diplomatic. No, he has three CDs maturing.
* On his trip abroad, Romney is traveling with a shovel. If the opportunity presents itself, he plans to bury his tax returns on foreign turf.
* The RAGBRAI bicycle ride across Iowa is under way. In hopes of boosting his popularity in this key battleground state, President Obama was spotted pulling several dozen bikers in his campaign bus.
* Two days after the Obama campaign released a video mocking Mitt Romney singing "America the Beautiful," the Romney campaign released a video mocking Obama's singing of "Let's Stay Together." The campaign has degenerated into karaoke night at Applebee's.
* We certainly have a clear choice in the presidential election. I, for one, am proud to live in a country where we can vote for either the guy who can't find his birth certificate or the guy who can't find his tax returns.
* President Obama on tax cuts for the rich: "It ain't right." This demonstrates how English standards have fallen. We've gone from the George H.W. Bush administration, when the first dog wrote a book, to a current president who uses "ain't."
* Fiat is now offering the first in-car espresso machine. "Officer, I would have signaled, but my espresso was ready."
* Fiat is going to offer this in the new 500L. I'm pretty sure the "L" is for Looney.
* This should address the big problem of motorists paying too much attention to the road.