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Brad's afternoon edition
* New Omaha Schools Superintendent Nancy Sebring resigned about six weeks after accepting the job. After hearing she lasted six weeks, several former Omaha police chiefs contacted her to ask, "What's the secret to your longevity?"
* There's no truth to rumors that the Omaha school board forced Sebring to quit. The school board didn't use the word "quit." Members just told her to consider every day for the rest of her life to be a snow day.
* Two Ohio State football players were arrested for allegedly urinating outside a restaurant. This may be the biggest scandal to hit the Ohio State athletic department in almost four hours.
* Allegedly, the two players were urinating outside a restaurant when a police spotlight shone on them and they ran. When new coach Urban Meyer called for players to step up and seek out the spotlight, I'm not sure this is when he had in mind.
* We have a new Miss USA. This is the pageant based solely on looks and personality, with talent not entering into it. It's the same way we choose our presidents.
* Donald Trump presided over the 2012 Miss USA pageant. At the end, he announced that if Mitt Romney is elected, Miss USA gets to serve as vice president.
* If you're unfamiliar with Miss USA, it's the scholarship pageant where contestants make NFL cheerleaders look overdressed.
* The 2012 Miss USA pageant was just held. According to tradition, the pageant officially begins when Miss Ohio says something nonsensical.
* In this weekend's Miss USA Pageant, when asked to name a movie with a positive female portrayal of women, Miss Ohio answered: "Julia Roberts in 'Pretty Woman.'" Who can forget this inspirational story of female empowerment that let women know it's possible to achieve true happiness by becoming a prostitute?
* Russian billionaire Pavel Durov folded 5,000 ruble notes (about $160) into paper airplanes and flew them out his hotel window to a group of pedestrians. He was originally going to invest in Facebook stock, but he decided this was a more productive use of the money.
* Mark Zuckerberg is accused of not tipping after a meal in Rome while on his honeymoon. Evidently, whoever is criticizing him is unaware that Zuckerberg has lost approximately $4 billion since Tuesday.
* Justin Bieber, or as I now call him, "The Fugitive," was wanted by police for scuffling with a photographer who allegedly blocked Bieber's car at a Los Angeles mall. How is law enforcement ever going to find D.B. Cooper - they can't locate Bieber.
* Kiplinger.com rated Omaha the No. 1 city in which to raise kids. Let me be candid. Even the most ardent family man in town would trade this for a top 10 preseason ranking in Phil Steele's football ratings.
* Southwest Airlines is looking into expanding internationally. This is wonderful news for all Americans who've ever dreamed of flying to Paris with stops in Butte, Fargo, Macon and Harrisburg.
* In the NCAA baseball regionals, Creighton was eliminated by UCLA. The Bruins had the No. 1 RPI in the country. The NCAA sent Creighton to L.A. to play the Bruins only after realizing the first choice of sending the Bluejays to New York to face the Yankees might look bad.
* A Diamondbacks-Rockies game was delayed due to thousands of bees. Because it's Major League Baseball, 800 of the bees tested positive for performance enhancers.
* The game was interrupted by thousands of bees. I haven't seen anything like that since a group of 20-pound mosquitoes picked up a fan sitting behind home plate at Rosenblatt Stadium circa 1989 and dropped him in left field.
* On Memorial Day weekend, Metta World Peace tweeted, "Happy Labor Day." This is the most embarrassing thing that ever happened to Metta World Peace - well, next to the time he showed up for Thanksgiving dinner dressed as the Easter Bunny.