Dear Annie: I am getting married in May. My fiance, "Stan," didn't like his last job, so my brother hired him. Stan has been working there for a year.
I recently found out that Stan has been pulling nasty pranks on my brother. He never mentioned it to me. My brother works alone during the busiest part of the day, with the pressures from sales people, supervisors, repair people, etc. Stan works the evening shift.
I have seen the pictures of the pranks: cutting the fingertips off the gloves my brother uses for his work; putting spray powder and piles of wood on the chair my brother sits in. He hides tools and rags. The list is endless.
I think Stan is being disrespectful and childish. I am upset and disappointed. These pranks are ridiculous and uncalled for, and I am stuck in the middle. My brother is under enough stress. He hasn't said anything to Stan, but his wife told me it takes him an additional 40 minutes every morning to find the tools that are missing.
Stan is a 39-year-old man. Should I intervene or let them work this out on their own? My brother has said he doesn't want to come to our wedding. I know he wouldn't miss it, but I'm sad he feels this way.
Disappointed in Pittsburgh
Dear Pittsburgh: If it were up to us, there would be no wedding for your brother to miss. Stan is an immature idiot. He may think these pranks are funny, but we suspect the only reason your brother hasn't fired him is because he is engaged to you. Tell Stan to knock it off. If he has a problem with management, he should discuss it like an adult.
Dear Annie: I am sorry that "Amazed in Honolulu" receives unwanted advances and inappropriate comments from male business associates. But my gripe is about when she says the advances invariably come from "a short, older, heavyset, balding guy." How rude to slam individuals based on physical characteristics. Shame on her.
When we are born, we aren't given the option of being short or tall, getting bald or having thick hair, etc. She's missing out by having such a judgmental and shallow attitude.
Dear Annie: "New York Grouch" doesn't want his co-workers to throw a retirement party for him because he secretly hated all of them. You should have told him that his co-workers were throwing the party for themselves to celebrate his finally leaving their office. They undoubtedly have known his true feelings for two decades. An old almanac quote comes to mind: "What you are speaks so loud, I can't hear what you say."
Old Geezer in Rural Ohio
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