Omaha native Brad Dickson reviews this week in sports. Dickson is a former writer for “The Tonight Show with Jay Leno.”
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The Nebraska football roster has swelled to 150 players, and those are just the quarterbacks who could play.
Kickoff next Saturday is 6 p.m., which means Nebraska's starting quarterback will be announced at 5:59:59.
Texas announced future home and home series with Brigham Young and USC. Texas officials wanted to play all four games at home. Then they realized, “We can't always play at home. This isn't like the Big 12 Championship game.”
There are tentative plans for a postseason game starting in 2014 pitting the Big 12 champion against the WAC champ. It will be called the “I Can't Believe Your Conference Isn't Extinct Either” Bowl.
According to Vegas oddsmakers, the odds of Kansas State winning this year's Big 12 conference title: 100 to one. Conference realignment is so crazy the odds of K-State winning this year's Mountain West Conference title are only 50-1.
After two players got in a fight Northwestern coach Pat Fitzgerald made them walk a lap holding hands. I miss the old days when Big Ten players weren't humiliated until the Rose Bowl.
The goal is to stop players from fighting. I say we make Evander Holyfield do this after all his fights till he finally retires.
Oregon State offensive lineman Tyler Thomas, who was caught naked inside a stranger's home, got down in a three-point stance and charged police. He won't be prosecuted, but a judge did rule him offside.
The Omaha Nighthawks backfield will include Jeff Garcia and Ahman Green. This year fans from Kansas City will be driving to Omaha to see NFL-caliber talent.
Garcia was introduced during a press conference at Harrah's attended by Mayor Jim Suttle. Suttle is aligning himself with the Nighthawks. Since the Suttle administration is involved, the problem will be coming up with a coin to flip to see who kicks off.
Tony Romo has a new girlfriend. There's something you can't say every day. Maybe every other day.
President Obama has come up with a plan to pay off the national debt. Four words: “Rex Ryan, curse jar.”
Illegal immigrants in Arizona claimed projectiles were hurled at them. Turned out to be several Matt Leinart errant preseason pass attempts.
Chad Ochocinco had his helmet knocked off with a vicious hit. Afterward, Ochocinco was rambling incoherently and not making sense so they knew he was OK.
Former NBA star Jayson Williams was sentenced to an additional year in prison after crashing his SUV into a tree while drunk. Gee, I can't imagine why he couldn't find a driver.
Michael Jordan's son Marcus blew $56,000 in one day partying in Vegas. Charles Barkley praised the kid for his frugality.
The Miss Universe pageant was last week. There was one representative from each nation, sort of like NU basketball fall camp.
Vlade Divac is going to be inducted into International Basketball Hall of Fame. Divac's bust is so lifelike it shows him flat on his back.
On “Omaha Day” in Kansas City the Royals and White Sox split a doubleheader. Both games lasted extra innings so they had to pay stadium employees more. Omaha Day was so authentic it went over budget.
To pay homage to Omaha, the infield was full of potholes.
At the Little League World Series, Taiwan defeated Canada 23-0 in four innings. I wouldn't say Taiwan's players are older, but they wanted to get the game over so they could watch “Matlock” on TV Land.
Jay Schrad won the Ashland Golf Club tourney after hitting a hole in one on the second playoff hole. Talk about putting pressure on your opponent. “OK, I need an ace to stay alive.”
Jimmy Carter won freedom for an American imprisoned in North Korea. Carter got the guy out of prison so he could travel to Omaha and try out for the Nighthawks.
Wednesday Omaha officials extended a warm welcome to the Vipers, the city's new indoor soccer team. Then they presented them with their wheel tax bill for out-of-town visitors using city streets.
Omaha officials have finally come up with a plan to solve city budget problems. Beginning tomorrow the fine for overdue books at public libraries will be $20,000 per day.
Last week students participated in a mock election to give them a feel of what it's like to vote in Nebraska. It was so authentic 80 percent of the students were told to stay home from the polls.
And finally: Officials in Canada are considering a ban on MMA fighting. In order to win over Canadians mixed martial arts is going to allow competitors to beat each other over the head with hockey sticks.
— Dickson, an Omaha native, is a former writer for “The Tonight Show With Jay Leno.”
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