Omaha native Brad Dickson reviews this week in sports. Dickson is a former writer for “The Tonight Show with Jay Leno.”
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I’ve been watching the Winter Olympics. At one point Al Michaels shouted, “Do you believe in miracles?!” It was right after NBC aired an event that wasn’t on tape delay.
How about those opening ceremonies? I haven’t witnessed that kind of pageantry since the last time I saw a Continental Basketball Association pre-game show.
NBC, including its satellite channels, is airing 800 hours of Winter Olympics. Well, 802 counting the non-figure skating events.
I love the crazy outfits the figure skaters are wearing. It looks like Village People On Ice.
You know what you call an Olympic male figure skater in a tutu over a chicken costume with purple spandex gloves? “Understated.”
Just to prove that skating judges place too much emphasis on past performance, the favorite in the women’s competition is Peggy Fleming.
Last Wednesday is being called “the greatest day in U.S. Winter Olympics history.” If you want to catch all the action, NBC will be airing it next Tuesday.
People are still talking about the pomp and circumstance, the sold out stadiums, the 24/7 news coverage — but enough about Hockey Night in Omaha.
The Winter Olympics have been plagued by rain, freezing rain, sleet, wet snow, high winds and fog. Or, as we call that in Omaha, “Thursday.”
On the first day of curling competition, the U.S. men lost twice. After, the sweep fans were waving brooms — wait, those were the competitors.
The largest crowd to ever watch a basketball game, 108,713 fans, turned out for the NBA All-Star Game. That should stand as a record until next year’s NU women’s basketball’s “Pack The House” day.
NBA Commissioner David Stern projects that under his watch the NBA will lose $400 million this year. That’s important because it qualifies Stern to run for governor of Nebraska.
There’s a proposal to embarrass tax cheats in Nebraska by posting their names online. If you really want to embarrass tax cheats, make them suit up for the NU men’s basketball team for the next road game at Texas.
Florida International, under first year coach Isiah Thomas, is averaging 119 fans per game. If it’s a typical college program, the announced attendance is something like 12,846.
The NU women are still undefeated and playing brilliantly. It’s like watching a WNBA game, only with fans.
President Obama unveiled a $3.8 trillion budget — no, wait, that was the University of Texas’ payroll for their football coaching staff.
Nebraska offensive coordinator Shawn Watson received a $5,000 salary increase. Getting a raise after the year he had, Watson feels like a Wall Street broker.
NU assistant coaches can receive bonuses if the team achieves its academic goals. You think students feel pressure now, imagine having Carl Pelini’s remodeling job hinge on you getting a B.
When Drew Brees appeared on “Oprah” last week, she tried to wipe his birthmark off. The only thing that could be more awkward is if she has Prince Charles on and says, “Let me see those gag ears.” Ouch!
There’s talk the Rams are going to draft Ndamukong Suh No. 1 and trade for Michael Vick. Meaning Suh would tackle Vick everyday in practice. This sounds like the first NFL deal brokered by PETA.
The Omaha Beef held its media day at the Omaha Marriott. A new members of the Beef staff made a local phone call from the hotel, putting the team already over budget for 2010.
Tiger Woods broke his silence Friday. The press conference was so tightly scripted, orchestrated and plotted in advance it felt like a television reality show.
I wouldn’t say Tiger got carried away with the apologies, but halfway through he apologized for NBC’s Winter Olympics coverage.
The Daytona 500 was stopped twice so crews could repair a pothole. Sounds more like the Omaha 500.
ESPN hockey commentator Barry Melrose revealed he rubs chicken excrement on his face to stay youthful. Let’s hope this doesn’t catch on. You think those milk mustache ads are annoying.
This is part of ESPN’s new strategy to make their personalities so revolting nobody will want to commit adultery with them.
Sadie the Scottish terrier won the Westminister Kennel Club competition, redeeming herself after having a “potty accident” on the green carpet at Madison Square Garden last year. This sounds like the worst “beating the odds” TV segment yet.
Sadie’s handler told the Associated Press that Sadie enjoys watching television. Then Sadie interrupted to say she thinks NBC needs to show Winter Olympics events in their entirety, stop cutting away and televise some hockey for gosh sakes.
And finally: University of Alberta students set a record for the largest dodgeball game, 600 people vs. 600 people. Everyone had fun except the last guy taken when choosing sides. He should be out of therapy around 2018.
--Dickson, an Omaha native, is a former writer for “The Tonight Show With Jay Leno.”
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